Blog Posts

ADHD Isn’t The Boss of Me!

Hi and Welcome!

In case you haven’t met me yet, my name is Loretta, and I’m an ADHD and Life Coach who has worked with dozens of humans who are affected by ADHD.

I believe kids should have fun with everything they do and not struggle so hard in school and life.

So I would like to share an activity that helps kiddos manage self-regulation.

Let’s dive in!

Do you know what self-regulation is?

Self-regulation is like self-control.

It’s knowing your body and feelings and what you need in that moment to help yourself stay cool.

For example, you may be disappointed you have to see the movie your brother wants to see instead of what you want to see.

With poor self-regulation, you might get really mad and scream. With good self-regulation, you might still get mad, but you’ll take deep breaths to calm yourself.

Self-regulation can also help you deal with uncomfortable situations. For example, if you know you are uncomfortable in big, noisy crowds, you can wear headphones to block out the sound.

Sometimes emotions are big. Really big.

Have you ever been REALLY mad? REALLY frustrated?

I’d like you to think of emotions like the weather. They come and go. If you’re feeling upset or frustrated, you won’t feel like that forever.  I promise!

You can prepare for strong emotions so you’ll know what to do when they happen.

So, let’s talk about self-regulation or AKA…getting mad. Getting frustrated.

Just like everyone else, once in a while, you get angry. You have been feeling more upset at your family because your sister takes a super long time in the bathroom.

Or your mom is late picking you up from soccer practice.

Or you can’t seem to figure out how to put a fraction in lowest terms.

Like the weather, it starts to get cloudy.

Before it rains.

You may begin to feel a little stressed before you get really angry.

If you know what causes your anger, just like the weather, you can prepare for it.

Here are some ways you can try to prepare for your trigger so you won’t get mad at your family.

Trigger #1 – Your sister takes a super long time in the bathroom.

Solution #1 – With your mom’s permission, you could put a timer in the bathroom so your sister and you could get equal time in the bathroom. If that isn’t possible, you could shower at night instead of in the morning, so you don’t feel rushed.

Make sense?

Trigger #2 – Your mom is late picking you up from soccer practice.

Solution #2 – You could bring a favorite book in your backpack and read if your mom is late. You could start your homework so you don’t have to do much at home.

Trigger #3 – You can’t seem to figure out how to put a fraction in lowest terms.

Solution #3 – After you have tried your best with your homework and still are having problems, you can ask for help or take a break and come back to it in a few minutes. Or turn to trusted grownups for support.

Coming up with possible solutions to triggers is practicing excellent self-regulation skills!

Loretta Holmes, MA CMHWC is the owner of Bella ADHD & Life Coaching. She helps clients affected by ADHD and/or anger stop their self doubt and over come their fears so that they can live a happy, healthy lifestyle. Discover more about Bella ADHD & Life Coaching services HERE or shoot Loretta an email at

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *